Tony Stark is the poster child for trying too hard. Whether in the comics or the MCU, one characterization that’s constant is his tendency to desperately try to control everything.
Having agency in our lives is important. I don’t believe in deterministic schools of thought — it’s our free will and ability to decide is what makes the world turn or not. But free will is deceptive.
There are times when we feel like we’re exercising free will, and yet we’re no longer in the control seat. One prime example of this is doing something for the sake of doing it and not for the result or enjoyment or value of it.
I set out on this 30-day Unblock Challenge to create a piece of content every day for thirty days, building creative muscle and pushing myself out of my comfort zone on a daily basis. I skipped three days before this post, and a day earlier in the week. But recovery is just as important as exercise, and pushing myself in spite of needing a break would’ve been a mistake.
Pulling this card from the deck reminded me that even with a 30-day challenge (or 90, or 365, or what-have-you) the point is not doing something every day so you can say you did it every day. If the sake of doing it supersedes the joy of doing it, it’s a bad sign.
Sometimes this can make a convenient excuse for being lazy. I get that. And it’s a judgement call every time to determine which is it: do you need a break or are you just lazy?
One thing that might make answering that question easier is observing our lives with more intention, and documenting so we can see patterns within the chaos of days blending together. I’ve tried bullet journaling (and other kinds of journaling, too) before, but come this December I’ve decided I’d make it a really honest shot. Keeping it minimal, keeping it simple, but sowing the seeds of documenting my life.
Documenting, not evaluating. One of the most important realizations I’ve had was to not judge what I write down. Just record what’s happening, what I feel. Looking forward to see how my bullet journal will evolve, and if it brings simplicity to my life.